Devious Instinct
by Lady Eclipse
Summary: This is based on the most recent chapters of the manga 52 and is a dark first person dive into Kaname's thoughts of Yuuki and the dangerous places they take him. Enjoy the ride!
1. Chapter 1

Devious Instinct

By Lady Eclipse

What a wicked, cruel child you are. That innocent smile, those watery eyes as they lay bare your heart; as you confess your sins that you feel are unforgivable. You resist me because your heart is not whole. How can that ever be a sin? That I remain so fervently in your thoughts, that the most grievious sin you can fathom is to harm my dull heart, you are without sin. You look at me with eyes shining with empathy as I list all those whose lives I have taken. All the plotting and cruel things I have done to others are meaningless to you. You see through all to the ancient loneliness in my heart, the agonizing anguish that reaches out toward you. You, whom I have loved since you first drew breath in this world. You who captured me by only existing. You who somehow intensifies this feeling every day to the point where I want to burst with it. My beautiful, cruel, precious girl. There can be no physical pain you could inflict, no words spoken no matter how hateful that you could utter that could harm me. The only thing that could break me would be 'goodbye.'

So my sweet creature, Zero can have that piece of your heart. The humans may continue holding a stake in your thoughts. As long as you are here, as long as I can hear your heartbeat, as long as I can smell your blood, that is all I need. Let me drown in your sweet red innocence. Let your cruelly kind love pour through me satiating every thirst. I will selfishly take all you offer. I can wait for the rest. This is the first time in my long life that I have been pleased with the long years due to me. I can wait forever my dear girl; as long as you stand with me. Please continue to torture me for all time.

***

My favorite moments are when I return to you from the dreary meetings with other vampires. You rush toward me with such unabashed joy to see me and embrace me tightly. Your relief and love pour upon me afresh and your soft lips press upon mine. Each time you get bolder, grow more comfortable with these little endearments. I cannot help but return them with ever greater enthusiasm no matter who is there to see. Let them look and know that you are mine, that I am yours and no other creature matters.

Yet this is dangerous territory my precious girl. How can I resist you when you blush so becomingly, when your eyes turn red with heat and passion. You look up at me drunk on my blood your body pressed up against mine, Such a wicked little temptress and you have no idea what you do to me. You know nothing of physical pleasure yet you seduce me with those eyes, those treaturous little hands that press against my back. How deeply I yearn to give in to you and follow this game until the end. I hate to strip you of another layer of innocence, but how much longer can I resist you? You gave me your heart and soul and now your body is calling to mine. Do you feel this need as I do? Do you feel this insatiable pressure? So much need.

I must be drunk on your blood as well, my restraint is slipping. I can feel your sweet love coursing through me, your selfless devotion rings through my mind as I lick your neck clean then nibble the newly healed flesh. You gasp and I can feel your blood rushing tempting me to taste again. A little more then. Just a little more and it will be enough. A taste of your collarbone, a caress of your sides. Oh dear, when did my hands stray so recklessly to more hallow ground above your restless heart? Just a little more and I can stop and leave you in virtuous peace. A lick of your ear lobe, a nip of blood from your lip. Oh no, a tactical error. I can taste your arousal in your blood. Confusion and pleasure war within you but you do not resist me. You so rarely resist me. Your trust is touching and makes me want to do more. To show you more. I need to stop....I must stop....but your delicate hands are undoing me. The way they move from my back to tangle in my hair to hold me close is awakening the predator in me. The desperate need to claim, to possess, churns within me but I must chain the beast. You must never see that reckless animal. You must stop your gentle unknowing kisses before we cross a line that changes you forever.

Just one more kiss, just one more touch and I must go. I must get away from your scent before I loose control. You are the first and only creature in all this world who can do this to me.

What....? My cruel girl, are those your fangs nicking my chest? Did you take advantage of my distraction to open my shirt? My poor girl, you are following your instincts but they will lead you to ruin. I capture your hands and try to pull away but you whimper and look sad, rejected. How can I tell you the dangers you face should we cross that line that is racing to meet us? What can I say to protect you from this beast within? My child, how can I save you from myself?

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Very short but Vampire Knight inspired me and I felt the need to write something (this was done roughly in half an hour). It's been years since I had the time to write a fanfic so I hope I haven't lost the touch. I'm not sure if this will be it or if the muse will continue pulling me along so your thoughts and support are welcome and appreciated.

The standard disclaimers apply. I don't own it and I gain no money for my drabbles.


	2. Deeper into the Abyss

Deeper into the Abyss

Yuuki, what cruel things you do to me. You naively moved through the world of humans making yourself so completely vulnerable to me. Time and again the temptation to undo Juri's wish threatened to destroy me. Those long nights and even longer days when you were not by my side. Those days when you insisted on separating us through polite conventions. Through titles, through honorifics. That misery upon misery that piled up through the years your blood forgot its origin. That pain that finally manifested in the unforgiveable act. I tasted another's blood. Another person's feelings of love and devotion filled me and left me cold and ashamed. Little Yuuki, did I want you to suffer so you would leave me forever? To end the torment of having you so close and yet a universe away? To prevent myself from destroying what Juri sacrificed her life for? For that sin, I have no right to make judgement of Zero tasting you. Of Zero stealing the only thing that has kept me alive...kept me sane. No, I have no right. I am resigned to that bitter sting and can only salve it with the knowledge that I am the only one who can taste you now. That Zero has the craving only you can fill, and which he will never again have.

Those two acts have hung in uneasy silence between us since their birth. I know only silence as a comforting blanket to hide them.

Yet...there are things that silence can't remedy. Words that must be spoken no matter how painful, how cruel. Sometimes the silence can be worse than the harshest word. Yet words can be the hardest thing to find and silence can be so comforting. Can you appreciate then how much I love you to seek out these words to give you. To break my comfortable silence and share with you my evils....my love. You, innocent wide eyed Yuuki, have no fear of silence because no ghosts haunt you whispering their anger, their vengeance. You cannot help confusing your crime with Zero time and again looking for some way to remedy a mistake that you did not know.

Sweet little Yuuki. Fill my silence with your silver laughter. Fill me with your quiet voice. Say my name. Speak it over and over again until you grow hoarse with it. Speak my name with no titles or honorifics attached to it forming an unbridgable chasm. Say it with your simple straitforward way that strips all things of their complications and lays bare the quiet truth beneath. Please....I beg you. Say my name so I know that I'm not alone anymore. Tell me that I will never be alone again and will always have you in my arms. Please. My precious girl, torture me, torture me with what I crave so desperately. Temp me with your blood, your soul, your flesh. Tempt me with all that I can't resist and would gladly spend eternity paying for. Let me taste you and I would impale myself upon my own sword. Let me breath you in and I will decimate any creature on this earth. Chain me my love. Chain back the ancient evil burning inside me. The first great destroyer. Cage this cruel beast within with your sweetness. I am upon my knees before you, my throat closed with need and awe of you. All I can do in this horrible and wonderful moment is cling to you. All I can do is savor the feeling of your arms closing around me, holding back the nightmares. I can feel you tremble with emotion. What are you thinking my little love? Can you sense my distress despite the cold mask I wear? You always could. Your arms tighten and you lower you mouth to my neck. Are you hungry or are you trying to comfort me? You quickly learned how much I crave this intimacy. I would gladly have you drink every drop of blood in my body and only regret not having more to give. To feel your fangs sink into my skin, to feel my blood leaving me through your soft lips, it is ecstasy my dear girl. The only thing better is when I taste your blood. There can be no doubts then. All of your feelings are there, undeniable as the morning sun. Blinding, searing, impossible to ignore. I can't help the gasp that escapes my lips as that sweet ache is eased by your bite. My eyes drift closed and contentment fills me. I hold you tighter. Don't stop until you reach the sky little one. Reach out to the heavens and take me with you for there is no chance I would be welcome there on my own.

Your lips leave my neck with a suddenness that jars me painfully back to reality. Your breath comes in little pants that fan across my skin.

"Make love to me... Kaname." You breathlessly whisper into my ear. My eyes snap open in shock and I fight with everything I am not to look into your eyes.

No. No! Do not say that to me. Don't finally speak my name without convention and offer that which I want so desperately. Your small hand finds my cheek and I am helpless to resist its gentle guidance. I can't help but to look into your shimmering eyes full of understanding and tenderness. Don't look down into the blood in my eyes offering everything, it threatens to undo the chains. It makes the beast stir from his uneasy slumber and want to take what you so innocently offer. I want you too badly to give you that. I can't subject you to that monster within.

Yuuki....what cruel things you do to me.

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Wow! What an amazing response. You all greatly honor me with your comments and certainly motivated me to try this again. I found inspiration had wandered away again but today I was watching the episode with all of Yuuki's flashbacks of her childhood (human) with Kaname and the muse found me again. I don't know if this is getting a little redundant....too much stream of consciousness gets a little old.....but I'll likely switch over into third person at some point unless you all could stand a little more time in Kaname's head.

Thanks again for the praise and the suggestions! I always enjoy feedback to improve my work!!!


	3. The Beast Emerges

**The Beast Emerges**

_"Make love to me....Kaname."_

My hands clench as I look into your earnest eyes. My throat closes against any response as I see the desire and need pooling in those mahogany depths. And the love...oh yes, the love. It is the sharpest weapon in your arsenal you devious creature. The beast growls or perhaps that is me. Your wicked hand caresses my cheek as you press close against me. _"...Kaname...please..."_ The chain snaps. Mine. Red fills my gaze and my embrace becomes a cage. I fist my hand into your long tresses earning me a shiver down your spine. No escape now little one. Mine. I pull you towards the bed. My mouth finds yours and claims it fiercely. My tongue caresses your fangs dragging along one to fill your mouth with my blood. Only mine. Only I can give you what you need. Taste my hunger, know my desire and feel my helpless entrancement with you. Your clothes become a tattered mess in my impatience. You obediently lie back upon the soft sheets but color stains your cheeks. Are you shy little one? Do my intent eyes make you nervous? Does the way I stare at you remind you of a beast of your nightmares preparing to devour you? You aren't wrong. But I promise you will enjoy every moment. You tremble beneath me and I can't help sampling some of the exquisite blood from your lip. You gasp and tense as my hands brush away the remains of your last barrier between us, but it is too late for that my beloved. I can taste the anticipation in your blood. Your pleasure and excitement course through me luring the beast closer. The shreds of my cloths mingle with yours and I become fascinated with tracing every line and curve you possess. Every inch of skin is tasted, kissed, bitten. Little sinful drops of blood dot your skin for me to feast upon. Yes my angel. You will be fed upon tonight. All of you. Ah the tantalizing pleasure of cleansing your skin of the blood. But not too much, you will need all of your strength tonight. Don't pass out on me tonight. Not yet. Little tremors of your skin follow my hand's wake and your fingernails bite into my arms. Your lips brush against my forearm and a fang grazes the skin. Is the passion getting the better of your shyness my dear girl? I pull back from my ministrations to savor the red in your wide eyes. Red like the blood trickling from the corner of your mouth. Are you afraid little Yuuki? Do you now realize who I truly am? What lies just beneath the smooth veneer of humanity? I am the beast, the predator, and it is my nature to consume you. And my dear girl, you are dangerously delicious. You are shaking and a soft surprised moan breaks free of your lips as I find more pleasurable places to explore. Your back arches and your hands latch onto my forearm in shock. I easily capture them and trap them above your head. I'm leading this dance my dear girl. The beast demands no less. You writhe and I become drunk on the mingled scent of blood and desire spilling into the room. Mine. Only mine. The beast becomes restless needing more. I must have more. I press upon you and lave your neck. I trail little affections upward to finish with your lips. Pressure from within builds and my grip tightens. More...somehow I need...more. Somehow you know, somehow you understand and you break my kiss to nip my neck. The beast growls and I can resist no longer. I shift and a sharp cry and the sweet scent of forbidden blood paints the air. Mine. Forever. The beast purrs in satisfaction as you heal....as you respond.....and from there on I'm afraid I have little other clear thought save the delicious sounds of your moans and the sensation of you being everything within and around me. And of course, the feeling of your fangs when you.....

***

Slowly I drift into consciousness and savor the comfortable moment of neither being truly awake nor truly asleep. Without much thought my hand seeks you to complete the contentment of the moment. My fingertips find your shoulder then trace their way down to your hip. A sleepy murmur greets me as a pull you back against me. Keeping my eyes closed I press my lips to your neck and drink in your scent. Sleep threatens to pull me back under but I resist. I want to hold onto this moment forever. I want to engrave every second into my heart to treasure for all time. Behind my closed eyes I sense the light in the room darkening. Sunset is fading into night and I must soon don my mask and face the savage games of politics. I must seal away all feeling and plot my schemes and smile coldly at the aristocrats who think they can use me. Only here, only now in this moment can I be vulnerable. Only here basking in your warmth can I let those ruthless shields fall and know that I am safe. That all that I hold dear is safe. I have resigned myself to doing whatever I must, kill whoever stands in my way, in order to protect you and the innocence you still cultivate. There won't be enough blood to spill should those foolish vampires and hunters alike try to involve you in their games. You are the sweet innocent so easily manipulated and any one of them see it plainly; they all see what you do to me. How easily I am swayed by your merest word. Is it foolish of me to lavish you with my love to openly? Is this a dangerous game I play by so obviously displaying my one weakness? Not at all. I want them to see my weak flank and make the mistake of attacking it. For I have much in place that will ensure that not one of them will succeed and the blood bath that will ensue will leave no doubt in anyone's mind who the true power is. I want them to know what you mean to me so they clearly understand the lengths I will go to destroy everything they are when they try to touch you. I tighten my hold as a soundless snarl vibrates in the back of my throat. A small hand absently rises to pet my hair and her groggy voice murmurs _"...don't worry....I'm okay...." _ a small yawn breaking your words encourages a small smile to carve my lips. _ "...no one would try anything with you sounding so scary...."_ You wriggle a little closer into me and I close my eyes against that vice in my chest you inspire. Your words....so wise my little one. I can let the mask slip here because you already know what is behind it and accept all of me. I can show you the killer, I can show you the beast and you will smile and hold me without reservation. How easily your love can bring me to the brink of tears. I, despite my long life, cannot find the words to say what you mean to me, the depth of my love and need. I will just have to satisfy myself with showing it to you. Forever. I bite you gently, shallowly and lap at the trickle of blood. I surrender. Take me, all of me and let me stay by your side. I give you all of my soul, as fragmented as it is. Please take me.

Mine.

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Hmmm..... a little darker and some limyness emerges. The fan girl me just aches to go even farther and really see what the beast looks like when Kaname lets his anger free.

I know these little snip-its are painfully short and in truth I'm actually one of those longwinded writers. However, the response is so good that I find myself impatient to get something out so I write these little snip-its instead of waiting a month to condense them into a proper chapter. Also, I don't think this writing style is well suited to long chapters. It's exhausting to stay in someone's head for that long!

Well then, I hope I didn't disappoint and I'll continue on exploring Kaname and all of his wonderful facets.


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